“Don’t Be Dramatic — Everyone Cheats A Little,” She Laughed After I Found The Texts. I Said…
She listens when I talk. She doesn’t have a secret gym boyfriend. The bar is low, but here we are. Trust issues.
Absolutely working on them. The first time this new girl mentioned grabbing dinner, I asked just us, right? No, Jason. She laughed, then realized I was serious. I explained. She just said, “I’m sorry that happened to you.” And didn’t make excuses for Emma. Didn’t say, “Well, maybe she had a reason. Just empathy. Novel concept.” 3 months out, Emma sent a long email. I blocked her everywhere else. Subject: I made a terrible mistake. The gist. Jason wasn’t who she thought he was. He ghosted her.
She realizes now what she lost. I was the one. She wants to try again. We were so good together. Everyone makes mistakes. Don’t throw away our history.
My response. Everyone cheats a little.
Remember? Maybe he’s just exploring.
Don’t be so dramatic. Then I blocked her email. For months out, a mutual friend told me Emma got engaged. Engaged to some guy she met on the apps. Known him 6 weeks. Apparently, she’s moving fast to prove something. I don’t know. Not my circus. Not my monkeys. Final update. 6 months later. I’m good. Actually good.
Not telling people I’m good while crying into my beer. Good. Genuinely good. The trust issues are still there, but improving. The casual relationship ended. Mutual decision. We wanted different things, but I’m dating here and there. Taking it slow. Learning what I actually want instead of just accepting what someone’s willing to give me. Moved into a better apartment last month. Signed a year lease. Felt like a big step. Committing to something again, even if it’s just a living space. Still in therapy. Still learning things I’ve figured out. Her cheating wasn’t about me being inadequate. Everyone cheats a little. Is not in fact normal. I deserve someone who doesn’t make me feel crazy for expecting monogamy. Leaving was the right choice. The wedding money I saved by cancelling. Bought a used motorcycle.
Emma always said they were too dangerous. I’m living my best life, one terrible decision at a time.
Someone asked if I have any regrets.
Just one. I regret not leaving the first time my gut told me something was off. I regret the months I spent thinking I was being paranoid when I was actually being observant. I regret not trusting myself, but leaving when I did. Using her own words as my exit line, not letting her rewrite history or gaslight me into thinking I overreacted. Zero regrets.
She told me everyone cheats a little. I showed her everyone leaves a little too.
Turns out we were both right. Edit three. Since people keep asking, would I take her back if she really changed? No, she didn’t need to change. She needed consequences and she got them. I’m not her redemption arc. I’m not her safety net. I’m not the guy who teaches her that actions have meaning by forgiving the unforgivable. I’m just the guy who believed her when she told me cheating was no big deal. And then I treated our relationship the same way.
